The Top 10 Ways To Turn Around a Bad Relationship With Your Boss
Category: Careers (AB17)Originally Submitted on 10/31/96.
1. Stop trying to win.
He/she has the power; at least more than you do. You may win the battle, but will likely lose the war.
2. Seek to understand why you're disturbed.
Sure, the boss may be a jerk, but why is this affecting YOU so much? Seek to understand this. It's really important, given most emotional reactions are about oneself, even if they are prompted by someone else's crummy behavior.
3. Seek to understand why your boss is disturbed or unhappy with you.
How can you possibly fix it if it's not clear to both of you what's going on?
4. Get that it's likely up to YOU to resolve such problems.
Unfair, perhaps, but your boss probably has more important/pressing matters to deal with than your unhappiness.
5. Get that your boss has a weird personality.
Some folks are great communicators and managers; others aren't. You can either be righteous and disturbed or you can get this fact.
6. Focus on your job and how well you're doing it vs focusing on your boss and his/her weaknesses.
Often, we pick a fight with our boss because we haven't done OUR job to the level of integrity or performance that we know we are capable of.
7. Quit.
Some work situations are just intolerable and will never be healthy or fixable. If this is the case, make plans to move on.
8. Take the boss out to lunch OUTSIDE of the building and talk about your troubles there.
When your boss is in the building, he/she will have Pavlovian reactions because of their official role. Outside of the building you've got a chance!
9. Don't gossip with others about the problems you're having with your boss.
This makes it very difficult for you to settle your differences with the boss because you've built up the problem with others.
10. Capitulate.
Get that perhaps your boss is accurate/right and if so, is acting perfectly normally. Hmmm, always a possibility!
About the Submitter
This piece was originally submitted by Thomas J. Leonard, Infopreneur, who can be reached at thomas@thomasleonard.com, or visited on the web.
Copyright 97, 98, 99, 00, 2001 CoachVille
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