The Top 10 Powerful Choices We Forget We Have

Originally Submitted on 5/31/2002.

As I consider my choices and assist clients in making their own, I've noticed a set of powerful choices we tend to overlook.
Let this list be a starting place for you...
What types of options do you routinely overlook?
Which choices could make a big difference to your success and happiness?
How will you remember to step back in the moment and consider those choices?

1. The choice to let go and move on

What if instead of thinking about how to act on a petty annoyance, you choose to let it go? How much annoyance does it really serve you to carry into this moment from the last?

2. The choice to confront our beliefs with data

Can you identify the underlying beliefs that keep you from looking at a broader set of choices? For example, "I've got to do it perfectly or [the people who count on me] will be disappointed." Maybe that belief was true at some point in your life. Check it out now.

3. The choice to see the game and offer to change the rules

Are you playing out a game or routine that you didn't consciously sign up for? Good cop/bad cop? Victim/rescuer? If this isn't the game you want to play now, what behavior could you choose instead?

4. The choice to go for something bigger

Sometimes when we're hung up on whether to go for Option A or Option B (a job, a date, a vacation, whatever), the reason it's hard to decide is that both options mean settling for so much less than we are able to create for ourselves. Ask yourself what could be bigger... put at least three more options on the table.

5. The choice to support others in doing things their own way

How often do we get our shorts in a twist because someone else does things differently than we would? What if you choose to let go of the manipulation project and wholeheartedly support the person in doing it their own way? You may want to explore Myers-Briggs or the Enneagram to deepen your appreciation of the many legitimate ways in which people differ.

6. The choice to admit ignorance or fatigue and ask for help

In the heat of the moment, do you tend to forget that you usually don't have to make it all by yourself?

7. The choice to call a time out and regain perspective

How many decisions truly need to be made this very moment? When you're struggling with a choice, give yourself the gift of a break... a walk around the block, a talk with a friend, whatever relaxes you and gets you back in touch with what's truly important to you.

8. The choice to get real about our fears and hopes

How often do we shy away from saying aloud what's so... even to ourselves? How much more powerful to get real, then decide what to do.

9. The choice to speak a difficult truth

Notice when you're struggling to decide among "Way of Avoiding Saying A", "Way of Dancing Around the Truth B" and "Way of Manipulating C"... what might happen if you added "Speaking My Truth D" to the possibilities?

10. The choice to accept fully what is

This powerful choice is ALWAYS available. For you, when is acceptance enough on its own to reveal the peace you seek? When is it a useful first step before you decide to create something new?

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About the Submitter

IdeaShape offers leadership development, coaching,
facilitation, Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (R), strategic planning, and related services that help executives, fast-trackers, teams, and professionals achieve their goals faster and more easily. .

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